Tuesday, November 11
If you could permanently get rid of one worry, what would it be?
Well, this one is a tough one. I guess, being a mother, there could be a whole slew of worries that would be great if they were non-existent. I could worry that I haven’t given them the tools they need to move forward, that I didn’t give them enough of my time, that I gave too much; that I was too strict, not strict enough… But that is part and parcel of parenthood. We worry, we do the best we can, hope for the best and send them off into the world.
I could take the easy way out and say it would be great to have no financial worries but that isn’t one I have. Mick is a hustler and will go out and find ways to make the necessary cash. I’ll do what I can. We’ll always do what needs to be done. It’s just who we are.
I could say not worry about infidelity but we don’t have that issue. We are both of the opinion that if the other strays, no amount of acting jealous and mistrusting the other will stop it from happening. Plus, neither one of us is interested in the “devil we don’t know”! We’ve invested 19 years in this relationship so far and it is based on trust so… this one is out.
I could say get rid of the worry of getting old but the alternative is not truly an option I would choose! I know way too many who didn’t even make it to 50 so I’m sure they would have wasted less time on worrying about lines and sags and living whilst they could instead of leaving this earth so soon.
Worrying about not having enough is foolish. We already have way too much stuff as it is. We don’t need more to be better people. Doesn’t mean we can’t strive to better our situation or living conditions, if that were the case, but not important enough to worry about.
So, what worry would I truly like to get rid of? Have it no longer part of my psyche, my thoughts, my dreams? My biggest worry is that I will never find myself enough. I’m getting there. I’m working on it. I am trying so hard not to worry about it because deep, DEEP, DEEP down I know is there is little kernel of truth, waiting, for when I am ready to believe it; just waiting to pop so that I know for sure.