I had a ten o’clock appointment this morning – a way overdue oil change and inspection for the special price of $57.45, which we KNOW will never cost just that because there will be this and the other. A whole nother story.
I leave my house at 9:25, giving myself more than ample time to get there. I take the exit to get on Highway 132 to head west. This exit, like most, if not all, the ones in Quebec, is beyond annoying. It means peeps have to criss-cross each other to get to where they want to go. Those coming out of the tunnel and wanting to go east must try to squeeze in by those coming from Hwy 20 (like me) who want to go west. There are three lanes going into two, the middle one being used for either east or west. Heaven forbid the guy going in the same direction as you actually lets you in. No, no, we don’t want that so we force them to slow down by turning towards them. It is quite the spectacle. Of course the two lanes leading west will merge into one so the ones on the right must find their way into the left before reaching the highway itself. Again, fun stuff.
Once on the hightway, the speed limit is 100 km/h which most of us figure means minimum. Ahem. And so we drive at 110-119 (because rumour has it the cops won’t waste their time before you hit 120). I am driving along, listening to my music and the traffic slows. The guy behind me is so far up my ass I figure he’d like me to pop the trunk so he could hitch a ride. There are cars ahead of me and beside me. It is obvious I could not even try to move over and let him fly by. I raise my hand to him in a “what the fuck do you want from me?” manner and ignore him. The reason the traffic had slowed? There was a truck in the right lane behind a tree that had just blown over INTO THE HIGHWAY! Did I forget to mention the wind is beyond fierce today?
We pass said situation and I can move over. “Honda-Casquette” – We call the young pups with their Hondas and their baseball caps (“casquette”) this endearing term – because they all have the same bad driving habits. My son is one though he doesn’t wear baseball caps. Anyhoo… Honda-Casquette speeds past me, swerves in front of me and then, get this, slams on the brakes so he can take the same exit I am. Dude. He is then stuck behind others making their way towards another highway (see merging scenario above). Soon as he gets a chance, he once again swerves in front of me and takes off like a bat outta hell. I see him flying between cars ahead zipping in and out. I do not wish ill on these drivers because of karma. But if I did…
I pull into my dealer’s garage, greet my service guy, at 9:50, by the way, and regale him and his cohorts with my tale. He then tells me that this morning the peeps with appointments seemed to think the time given was just a “guideline” of sorts.
As if your 7:30 appointment means any time between 7:30 and 8:30. Sigh. My one-hour appointment was going to be longer, I am afraid. “No worries, J-F, I had planned on going for a leisurely breakfast and brought my book.” And off I go, practically blown across the street. Of course it starts to rain and of course, I have no hood on my jacket but I make my way – a good, I dunno 1000 feet away? and arrive rather wet. Get my booth and my coffee and am promptly forgotten by my waitress.
Two chapters and an empty cup later, my waitress sheepishly comes by and says, so sorry, we’re not busy, which ironically I understand as I now am in the bidness. We make more mistakes and forget more things when we have too much time on our hands. Good thing her colleague noticed me sitting there. She takes my order, brings me another coffee and I’m happy.
By 11:45, I make my way back to the dealership and sit down, figuring my car should be ready. I decide to get up to get the wifi password and can see into the garage where I note my car is up in the air. Groovy. I am so glad my book is good.
Jean-François comes to get me sometime close to one o’clock. Total bill? $161.58. A little of this and a little of that.
I had plans to go do some shopping and whatnot but frankly, I just wanted to get home. I drive out of the lot and some doofus has blocked an entrance to another business so the guy coming towards us cannot get in and is blocking his lane. I shake my head and wait for the light, let the guy pass and miss my own light. Fine. The guy behind me starts honking because we are allowed to turn right on red after 9 am. However, I do not feel inclined to run over the pedestrian who is making his way across. Again my WTF hands go up. The man makes it to the curb so I turn onto my street. Guy behind me drives to my right on the shoulder only to see there is a truck parked in the way so now he has to come back in. And is lucky the guy in front of me did coz no way in hell I would have. I am laughing in my car all by myself, lemme tell you. We pass the truck and the guy once again goes onto the shoulder to take the same exit as I am, which is a grand total of 25 feet (maybe, I may exaggerate) away. Patience. Zilch.
A ha ha…..sounds like a …’normal’ day! 😉 Patience..yeah right! 😉 I’ll tel you though, all this resulted in an excellent piece!
There …more feathers for your tail! xoxo
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…and you may add a little ‘l’ somewhere in there 😉
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We don’t look at those 😉
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😎
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😉
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It really is… but for some strange reason, today was MORE so or maybe I was just inspired 😉
And I do thank you for the extra feathers! 🙂
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…very well deserved, each and every one! 😉 xoxo
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Oh stop… you’re gonna inflate my head!! xoxo
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With the day you had, what’s a little head inflation! 😉 xoxo
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Ha ha! Indeed!
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Patience is a good way to avoid becoming a patient, is what I say … 😉
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Indeed! I dunno where my own “zen-ness” came from today, quite frankly
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Z’long as you found some Zen, that’s good! 😉 I’ll send you a refill … 😉
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Tee hee!!
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My imaginary ZAPPER has a special setting for impatient and obnoxious drivers!
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Oh yeah! Zap! Zap! Zap!!
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A teeny bit stressful I think, but at least you had the sense to enjoy some quiet time with a book. I think the world is much less patient and much more demanding all round these days.
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I swear… and what is the friggen hurry?
Yes, I now keep my kindle with me at all times. One never knows…
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Driving used to be one of my favorite activities, but no more. Until I move away from cities, anyway. And I hate that car stuff always ends up costing more!
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I still do enjoy it, just not in traffic and thankfully this maroons are not everywhere…
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I like to drive on this road by a river and the speed limit at most is 40mph, usually less. It has signs every so often that say “scenic route” and STILL people treat it like a highway and fly up my butt. Luckily, I always have a lot of windshield washer fluid in my tank there and so if they get to close, I clean my window. It’s amazing how many people back off not wanting their cars to get wet. bwahahahahaha
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That is hilarious! The wash the windows trick!
Though the need to take this road (only coz there is less traffic, do they, I bet) and fly on it is a bummer.
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🙂 WINDOW WASHER at your service! tee hee
It probably seems an easier way to fly to them, yes.
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LOL!
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Goodness. I have to tell you that I was driving on a divided highway that had one of those steel post and cable dividers. It was sleeting and I was going slowly. A guy in a four wheel drive was on my butt then roared past me. Well about a mile down the road here was the guy hung up on the divider. Sweet. Didn’t stop to render aid. Wanted to stop and laugh but needed to move on.
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And all without you wishing him ill…
I can’t say how often I’ve witnessed some dumbass in the ditch after having driven like an idiot around me. I would never wish them to come to physical harm but I cannot help but feel a sense of “serves you right”…
And I swear. They think if they have a four-wheel drive they are immune to the elements. No one is immune from ice. Can’t help but shake my head…
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Hahaha. Pickups are the worst on ice. Have a great weekend, Dale.
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They are!
You too, Boss (though I work tomorrow… )
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Oh. Have a great Friday.
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It is so far… just worrying my tree will be blown against my house…
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Have to stop worring. It either will or it won’t. (Unless you have a chain saw )
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Haha! I’m not overly worried. Though ironically, I want to have cut down (have to ask the city’s permission first – do you believe that?) so we can widen our driveway… I may just bring the video I took today to plead my case…
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There you go. Call it a danger to the structure.
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I will definitely use that.
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😁
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I’m glad you survived the day and can share the stress in an upbeat post.
I remember, yes I remember well, those interchanges with their one-size-fits-all exit-enter-merge chaos! I hate them, quite frankly. 😦
I also remember how traffic flies on the freeways — until you hit the odd “I’m lost here” driver. One day on the #40 doing about 115 km the driver ahead of me realized he’d just passed his exit. So he came to a dead STOP — and started BACKING UP to the missed off-ramp. I almost stopped, then looked in my rear-view mirror to see a semi barrelling straight for me, smoke coming off his tires. Thankfully the left lane was free and I could zip around, or I’d have been the tomato in the steel sandwich.
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I did indeed. Was composing in my head on my return 😉
It is the most annoying thing ever. Every friggen exit is next to an entrance. Why? They probably thought it would save space. Ugh.”
Are you kidding me??? Holy Frijole!!! That is insane. In all my years, I have not had that particular experience… Sheesh.
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Bob was showing me news scenes on his phone at supper. La Belle Province is being hit by “global storming” in a big way! Shame to complain about all that rain and snow when some folks are fighting raging fires, but still…
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The winds have been a mess all over. Trees down, power out. Mother Nature is all in a tizzy all over the world.
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It does seem that way. I can’t imagine how the people in the early 1930’s — particularly 1935 here in the west — must have felt. It must have looked like the weather would never be “right” again.
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Must have been nuts.
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Did you say Quebec or New Jersey? I’m glad you made it home in one piece if a little light in the wallet. Reading that makes me want to pop a top and to take the edge off! Cheers.
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Quebec, my friend… We have the dumbest engineers ever. Yep. Made it home in one piece with a story to tell 😉 And guess what? I have popped the top off! Cheers! 🍻
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You are real in the most delightful ways!
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I am definitely me 🙂
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Ah Dale, your day is so indicative of many of us but you write it in a way that i have to laugh at and enjoy to read. believe me when I say that my days like this do not end in me laughing, but something else entirely different. lol. Well done.
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I am so happy that it got you laughing as that was my goal. To entertain you with my silly observations 😉
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Wow, how different your life from mine. 7:30 bus to Norwich, 8:50 bus to Attlebridge, walk 5 miles along Marriotts Way, loads of fungi and autumnal foliage, unfortunately also drizzly, mizzly misty rain… not good for the camera. Lunch along the way, stopped in a pub for coffee at Drayton, chatted to a couple of nice guys, continued on our way for another three miles, caught bus the last little distance into Norwich (cos on a damp day 8 miles is enough), bus back to Yarmouth. Late in, late to late, late to peel off the damp clothes. Hurting and tired, tried to catch up on the posts, but didn’t get yours. Sleep insistence. Good morning, Dale.
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No kidding! I am not a public transport gal, myself.
Good morning, Crispina. Nos misty drizzly is not good for camera and depending on cold, not good for you, either… But you day still sounds lovely to me.
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It was enjoyable. But tiring. Though yours sounded just as tiring
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Not too bad as there were three hours of reading and eating between “events” 😉
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But at least it gave you a chance to eat and read. 🙂
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Exactly. I am all about the silver linings 🙂
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I have noticed. Maybe that’s why I like you.
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What a wonderful thing to say! I love how we form friendships over the Internets. I think it has to do with the fact that we write what we feel and express, sometimes better than we could in person, which opens the door further.
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Yea, I’ll go with that. Also (though this doesn’t apply to you) we chose the when and how long of our contacts. No dropping in unexpectedly for a cuppa… and staying for the rest of the day.
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This is true. And, that doesn’t mean that if you were to visit Montreal, I would not insist on meeting you in person… for a cuppa that could last for hours 😉
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Ah, difference. Big-big-big difference. And ditto in reverse.
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Sweet!!
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🙂
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Ha ha that right turn on red thing gets me every time we visit — completely unheard of outre- Atlantique. But the lack of patience is, sadly, universal…😥
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We’ve only had it a few years now and there are streets where you can’t at all or at certain times like this one. By law, you do not have to go at all and others are not allowed to honk at you if you choose not to. That putz would have me hit the pedestrian (who, he obviously did not see). C’est frustrant!!
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Dear Dale,
Oh dear. What a day! I hope you didn’t get blown away on top of it all. BTW we call those little Hondas crotch rockets. They seem to only be ridden by arseholes who think they own the road. I once had one come up behind me and pass me at great speed. It was a day for satisfying Karma. There at the bottom of the hill was a highway patrolman. I couldn’t resist. I waved at them as I passed by, following the speed limit, wide grin plastered across my face.
Then the wait. Oy. I once waited 4 hours for my car at the dealership only to find that I’d been marked as going home and not waiting there. I was furious.
At any rate, now that I’ve made it all about me, your story left me breathless and irritated. I hope you were able to settle in last night with soothing glass of wine and some sarcasm with friends. 😉
Shalom and lotsa hugs,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
I almost did! Crotch Rockets! Buahahaha! I so love it! And yes, that is about the only thing I would wish on them – that karma thing…
That’s part of the fun of blogging – it gives one a forum to exchange stories. At least I had prepared for a two-hour wait… That extra hour was a – umm – bonus. Yeah, that’s it, a bonus 😉
And yes, that is exactly what I did plus hours of Call the Midwife 😉
Shalom and lotsa love with wine and friends,
Dale
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What a morning, Dale! Your story makes me happy that I quit driving and gave away my car. 🙂 Aging has its benefits.
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Ha ha! Of course it was great fodder for a post 😉 Thank goodness not all days are like that!
I admit to not being a public transport gal…
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Q,
Peeps are in a hurry to get nowhere in particular, because that’s what I always think to myself when someone passes me going 65 in a 25. Like . . where in the blessed fuck are you going man? Home to play with yourself? G’luck with that holmes!
I think it speaks to the collective psychosis of a totally preoccupied world where people do not exist inside of moments except in the most vicarious of ways. So when they get in their car, it’s like they feel as if they finally have control over something. Which they don’t of course. And this delusional mindset isn’t just stupid, it’s dangerous.
That said, I hate when people don’t abide by traffic signs/lights/etc. I no longer make gestures or lay on the horn though, seeing as how you never know if someone’s toting heat any longer.
Love the songs! Of course . . .
B
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B,
Yep. Your need to weave in and out of traffic to get to where you are going in a dangerous manner makes you look like a raving eejit. What in the blessed fuck is your hurry?
Oh, hell yes. I am the centre of my universe and you are in my way. It is so dangerous.
I know! I saw the “no turning right on light” sign, so I stopped. After the honking, I relooked at the sign and saw in itty bitty letters below that it applied to the 6-9 am slot. Meanwhile, I DID see the man crossing the street – man who had the pedestrian right-of-way, by the way which is why I could not help but throw up my hands (I never lay on the horn unless someone is “sliding” into my lane towards me). And that worry is a “Murican thing”…
So glad you did. I was counting on you for noticing my musical choices (I had to put the two because I couldn’t decide between ’em!) and no one else commented.
Q
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I was stuck in traffic yesterday so I started to rolodex my escape. Ten minutes changed my plans but it ended up alright . . with nary a honk or a middle finger.
Oh, and when I WANT to give the middle finger to some asshole, I wave instead. This really pisses peeps off. Like the drugstore cowboy who honked his horn on me, after which I waved. As he passed me he honked again and they we were, side by side . .him honking and me blowing a kiss his way and laughing. I am pretty sure that WAS worse than the finger as far as he was concerned. Fuck him.
We have Stop signs inside of certain shopping areas that NOBODY pays any attention to! They go right through them, and so every once in a while I have to learn them a lesson about Stop signs and how they work as I cross the street.
Of course. That’s more of my wheelhouse right there.
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I love that: rolodex your escape…. And when you are stuck, what point to work yourself up into a frenzy – it’s not like there are many options.
Oh yes. That drives them nuts! No wonder we get along so well… I have blown my fair share of kisses to assholes, too! Fuck ’em all.
Do NOT get me started on the ignored stop signs. Good on you on learnin’ ’em a lesson.
I figured if anyone would appreciate my choices, it would be you 😉
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I have to entertain myself since I will get pissed otherwise. But then I just start looking at ways out of it.
Every now and then I’ll very obviously take a pic of their license plate. They don’t know WHY I’m doing that. Gives em something to ponder on.
I had someone HONK at me recently, so I walked over to his window and pointed to the sign and said something to the effect of “Check that out . . it means you”.
Absotively.
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Perfect attitude to take, in my most humble opinion.
Yes! Just don’t get caught here… it’ll cost you $600 and 4 points…
The guy who honked at me is lucky I am not inclined to get out…
Posolutely
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I don’t know what would happen if I got caught here. Good thing I know a few cops, LOL.
I am not inclined to get out either, but if I’m walking . . all bets are off.
Primitively . . .
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Have they issued painful fines in your neck?
Walking is a whole nother kettle of fish!
Well.. I can’t beat that one…
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My daughter got fined a hundred and fifty bucks while driving my car a few years back. I hadn’t gotten it inspected yet. She felt badly but I told her it was my fault. I
It’s game time.
Indubitably?
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That’s right… you guys have inspection rules. It was your fault!! But what about holding your cell phone – any fines there?
It is!
Ostensibly.
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They’re inane and I would never get my car inspected if I could afford not to. Hell, if I could afford not to . . I just wouldn’t drive.
I don’t think there are fines for holding your cell phone.
There we go!
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They are. So glad we don’t have that one.
It might be coming… here, it is ridonkulous. I got nailed a few years ago. Cost me $300 back then.
😀
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I won’t stop. I’ll just do what I do now anyways, put it on speaker or use my bluetooth.
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Oh, that is allowed. It’s the physical holding of the phone that has become illegal.
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I do that too, LOL. Seeing as how I don’t know if it’s legal or not, I just lower the phone when passing a cop.
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Which is a wise thing to do…
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I don’t often do the wise thing, so yeah, I’m proud of myself for it.
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Buahaha! Uh huh…
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You mentally handled the delays and entitled drivers much better than I might have. I’d have wished 2 flat tires on all the “Casquettes” cuz that’s just the way I roll with drivers like that. 😈
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I always fear that if I wish ill on them, it’ll backfire onto me!! Can’t say I wouldn’t smile if I saw them pulled over to get a ticket, though…
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You’re right to take the high road and not wish ill on them (and obviously a kinder person than me). But where’s a cop when you need one? I’m soooo over all these douche-drivers who break every law possible just to get in front of you at the next light. 🙄
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Oh, it has nothing to do with kindness! It’s self-preservation! Totally selfish on my part 😉
And seriously. The cops are NEVER there to witness these douches. What is up with that?
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Murphy’s Law?
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That too!
But more along the lines of Karma 😉
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I think they must be close cousins.
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Definitely related…
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well, at least you are now up to date with your oil change, and won’t have to go through this again for a few months…
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True that… though they detected a problem with the steering rack – a very expensive problem… they are going to call Ford to see if something can be done as I’ve not had the car for 5 years…
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they always manage to find something… I hope it’s covered1
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It has to be. I do not have $1500 plus labour to put on the damn thing.
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auto repair costs are the worst!
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They are!
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Omg
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Haha!!
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People are crazy. Ugh. It does not sounds like a fun day.
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Being me, I turned it into a silver lining – took “me” time to have a leisurely breakfast, read a book and got a post out of it 😉
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Well, there you go. Sometimes I love having to go somewhere where I know I’ll have to wait and get time to read. 🙂
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Hey! ⚡️💥We have all that stuff here. We must be related.
So, I decide walking is faster, and less stressful, and get hit by a cyclist.
I was obeying all pedestrian rules, and was on the sidewalk. Now, my back is screwed!
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Listen up 🧚🏻♀️🌟! I am not remotely surprised.
Get the hell out! That is so not cool.
Hit on the friggen sidewalk. That blows big time… so, you’ll have to live with this?
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Yes! I now own a heating pad and am single handedly keeping Salon Pas in business.
The handlebars smashed into my centre back. 7 years ago, one of my sisters pushed me down a flight of stairs, and my back was hurt in the same spot. I seemed to get over that just in time for the bicycle injury.
If a cyclist doesn’t have the guts to ride in traffic, where they are allowed to, then walk or take public trans! I really hate cyclists.
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Your sister pushed you down a flight of stairs??
Jeez… And once you hurt your back, it basically follows you for the rest of your life. Doesn’t help when you get re-injured in the same place…
Cyclists piss me off. They think they own the street and that road signs don’t apply to them.
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Most cyclists are anarchists on wheels. Don’t get me going…
I think they should be licensed, like cars, and pay fines like drivers. Until they have to own their crap, they will continue their reign of privileged terror.
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I am one hundred percent in agreement with you. I almost ran one over the other day. Ever since there is a bike path all along de Maisonneuve, they act like they don’t have to stop at street crossing. Uh. hello?
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Aspholes!
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Ya… my sister… very sad.
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I won’t ask…
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……..
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Exactly.
xoxo
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